Yeah me!

Ok I lost my job...YEAH!

I have no students in class...YEAH!

I have little income....Yeah!

I have a workshop comming up...YEAH YEAH!!

why YEAH to all this....job, I hated it, time to pass the crown on to some other deserving schmuck. I miss my dearest Marci but besides that...pooh on everything else.

No students in class, now I just need to focus on practice, practice, practice...I'll be the BEST teacher when people start comming back to class after summer vacation

I have little income...I'll enjoy that lemonade that much more.

I have a workshop comming up....YEAH YEAH!! This will ROCK. I am so happy, gettin my name out there and dancin etc....whoa...ok, writing can't compare to the singing & dancing I'm doing right now.

Organizing CAN has been fun! For once people have to ask my approval and I'm getting some respect. I can look back and say, "Baby Trey, you were my inspiration and look at what I did!"

Point in case ~God gives us what we need, not what we want~

A new realization...

Ok, I've got to admit, I'm totally superficial. I think its in all of our nature, but it isn't helping me grow closer to the Lord. Lately I haven't been the best friend I can be to those who are deserving of my friendship. I haven't even been really focused lately. What's my deal? Who knows. I did some meditation, a little prayer too. Helped some, but I've been having these really selfish feelings of ONLY ME ME ME matters. It was nice this weekend to have others take care of my babies. People I didn't even really know were helping Trey when he approached them w/requests for "shoes off". Its been so long since a Non-blood relative has helped me with the boys. I need to learn to differenciate the kindness of others with kindness with motives.

Seeing mark after almost a year was interesting. He drains me. Its like being around the devil. Even his house is depressing, the color of the walls in that house, the old pictures...yuck. As always he made me feel like a cheap and dirty person. I was proud that I stood up for the kids and I through all his retarded and absurd requests and accusations. Usually I give in, cry, whatever it takes to appease him.

Long weekend, nice break, now I don't want to be here. I want everybody to leave me alone and let me make my decisions. I don't feel like I'm getting a whole lot of help right now. Oh well.

Here I am!! Here I am!!

Ok, so I'm feeling a little French today...ha ha...inside joke...no comments on that one please, just don't even ask...

I'm feeling a little out of touch, a little uninspired and quite despondent. Time to pick up the good book and hit a Psalms or something, right???

Recap of events...not in this order....

Missed the belly dance course, the whole point of going to Louisiana. Oh well, I'll catch the next one, right? But I still got my fill of belly dancing when I went to Zeus and watched the beautiful & talented Angela dance and she asked me to get up and dance with her. YEAH!! That was cool! Shaking my hips in my low rise jeans and a hip scarf...just call me Shakira!

The 4th was fairly good. I got a small break from the typical hum drum of Houston and got to go to the little town of Lafayette. Interesting visit to say the least. The kids visited with their dad. Surprisingly, Spencer who is most attached to his dad just departed by saying in his best 3 year old babble, "ok daddy, bye, I'll miss you...smile". I was surprised. He didn't cry, he just accepted it. Then little Spencer asks me, "where are we going now, to my home?". My reply was no, McDonald's. He showed some real emotion about that.

Ran into some friends from High School. Got invited to a BBQ, what's the 4th without a BBQ, right? The kids & I went. They had a blast and were burnt out, I was well caffinated, which made for a nice 3 1/2 hours back home.

Despite the dumb fights I had to endure with Mark all in all....good trip, nice break!